the film snob

A cyberspace journal about my experiences as an NYU film school grad student, reviews of current and classic films, film and TV news, and the rants and raves of an admitted (and unapologetic) film snob.

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Location: Washington D.C.

Esse Quam Videri -- To be, rather than to appear

Friday, August 04, 2006

An Open Letter to Rob Schneider

Dear Mr. Schneider,

I read today that you have pledged never to work with Mel Gibson, based on his actions last week in which he was arrested for drunk driving and proceeded to subject the arresting officers to an anti-Semitic tirade.

I understand how you feel. Mr. Gibson's actions were deplorable. His hateful words make me wonder if my unfettered defense of his film, The Passion of the Christ from those who charged it was deeply anti-Semitic, was misplaced. Obviously Mr. Gibson has some issues in his life that are in desperate need of redemption, far beyond his drinking problem. I confess I like Mr. Gibson's work and even think that as a person, he is decent, warm and gracious. Which is why his actions a few days ago hurt us all so much. It will be interesting to see how and if the industry forgives him. I feel his apologies were very sincere and the fact that many in the Jewish community have embraced his pleas for forgiveness is a step in the right direction. But is it too little, too late?

Which leads me back to your announcement today that you will never work with Mr. Gibson.

With all due respect Mr. Schneider, you are a half-wit actor who stars in the sorts of films for which the "zero star" category was invented in the first place. Even if this unfortunate incident with Mr. Gibson had never taken place, there was never any chance in hell that an actor of your phenomenally sub-par caliber and ineptitude for choosing parts would have ever gotten close to working with Mel Gibson anyway.

But I thank you for your heart-felt stand--self-righteous, self-promoting and utterly inconsequential though it may be. Good luck with the inevitable Deuce Bigalow sequel.


Brandon Fibbs


Anonymous Nate said...

Sugar tits.

11:26 AM  
Blogger Justin said...


11:57 AM  
Blogger Brandon Fibbs said...

With the picture of Rob I posted, it brings a whole new level to "sugar tits." Wish I could say that was intentional.

9:18 AM  
Anonymous POD said...

I hate to reveal myself in this way, but the nipple "star" that Mr. Schneider is wearing is an exact replica of the one worn by Janet Jackson during the infamous wardrobe malfunction from the Superbowl from a few years ago. I am sure that when he posed for that picture that he was making fun of that moment.

7:30 AM  
Blogger Brandon Fibbs said...

I know. Exactly. That's what makes Gibson's "sugar tits" comment and my posting of that old Schneider picture so ironic--at the time of the post, I hadn't heard the "sugar tits" bit yet. Just a piece of blogosphere serendipity.

7:35 AM  

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